Can inner dialogue ever come back? Spirituality (power of now)?

After going through a rough time experiencing depersonalization, I picked up the Power of Now. I trained my mind to stop "thinking" or quieted the constant brain chatter (inner dialogue). It was a very blissful and peaceful experience, but it's getting old. I was in a very bad state (mentally) when I read this book and stopped the mind. I was in a desperate search to help me get out of depersonalization. Ironically, spirituality works on removing the self, which is what depersonalization is like. I would like for some brain chatter/problems, anything to do with my life, to come back. I know I have thoughts, but i feel like i "muted" them sort of. I just don't know how to activate them. Please, do not respond saying that this is a very desired place and that I should want to live like this. I have lived like this for a year. I am trying to get back to my "self". Also, this has been a hellish year. If anyone went through depersonalization they would understand. So don't hate!